"Blue skies smiling at me, nothing but blue skies will I see" - Blue Skies lyrics by Les Paul.
Oh to feel good again. Since my last post, it has been an awful few days, as this has probably been the worst allergic reaction in quite a while.
Thursday was spent in a completely haze of zombie. I roughly remember getting up and going for a walk (previous obligation which I decided I had to uphold). I'm fairly certain that I wasn't very good walking company as I'm not sure I held up my end of any conversation. I vaguely remember her attempting to start conversations, and me using all my energy to reply back. The rest of the day was autopilot in between 3-4 hour naps. I was stressed out, panicking about friends, relationships, life, mistakes I made years ago suddenly being of the utmost importance.. and depression that I would never get it all fixed, or could never overcome it.
Friday, I woke with extreme pain. The type of pain is hard to describe, but somewhere between being thrown down a flight of stairs and being hit by a truck, with your insides feeling like they were on fire. No matter what I ate, what drugs I tried, heating pad or no, nothing helped. If I remained in one position too long, the pain would increase. Even breathing hurt. Shallow breaths were ok, but still caused minor pain. Deep breaths were akin to stabbing myself in the ribcage. Thankfully by Friday night this calmed down to a dull ache. On top of all this, I was still depressed and on the verge of tears.
Saturday was more of the same only less. Fortunately the pain subsided enough for me to attend a writers meeting. It was good to get out of the house, but my depression was bad enough that had someone said "Boo" to me I'm sure I'd have broken down in tears. Deep breaths were still painful, but at least I could move without wanting to die.
Sunday.. Today was pretty good. A little depressed when I woke, and some nagging negativity. But the pain was almost gone, just a little remains when I breathe deep. The remaining pain seems to be due to having crap in my lungs, which I'm hoping will go away tomorrow. The depression has lifted (HURRAY!) and I'm regaining my energy and hopefullness!
Maybe I will remember this, the next time I decide to test my allergens.
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2 comments:
So sorry you've had a rough week. It's been rough here too. I hope you continue feeling better.
BTW, do epsom salt baths help shorten the duration of the pain at all? I find they help somewhat for me, sometimes.
I honestly haven't tried epsom salts since I was a kid. Most times my pain isn't that bad, and this last time I couldn't have even sat still long enough for the bath to be feasible.
But I'll keep it in mind to try another time.
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