Reasons I left Nebraska

It's winter in Nebraska!
And the gentle breezes blow
Seventy miles an hour
At thirty-five below.

Oh, how I love Nebraska
When the snow's up to your butt
You take a breath of winter
And your nose gets frozen shut.

Yes, the weather here is wonderful
So I guess I'll hang around
I could never leave Nebraska
I'm frozen to the ground!


-- I have no idea who wrote this.. and you might think they're exaggerating, but unless you've experienced a real Nebraska winter.. you have no idea. Yes, your nose will get frozen shut, and yes, sometimes you can get frozen to the ground.